Einstein’s Story - Crafty Beasts

Hi, I’m Einstein, and as you may know, I am Chief Product Developer at Crafty Beasts Brewing Company. If you are wondering how I pulled off my master plan to open a craft brewery for beasts, this is my story...

Hunkered down in bed one night I was rolling around, scratching, and thinking lovingly about my human – like I always do. I was reminiscing about all the fun things we did that day – playing fetch, walking in the park, going for a drive, getting an ice-cream. It sure was a great day. Yes, we do everything together. At that moment a loud crack and fizz roused me from my drooling slumber. Jumping up, I sped to gaze questioningly into my best friend’s eyes. My human said, “Sorry Einstein. This is craft beer – a drink that is made just for humans. It isn’t good for you, my buddy.”

I admit this made me really sad. We do pretty much everything together.

It didn’t seem right to me. But I am a smart pooch and I didn’t whimper for long. Instead, like always, I found a solution. Not long after that day, I did it. I snuck a couple of laps of my human’s craft beer but it was… let’s just say, not for my palette. I wanted a brew that didn’t have any of those weird human ingredients, like “alcohol”. I wanted a beer for me too. Then we could enjoy our beers together. Like everything we do.

Eureka, it came to me! I will make a delicious, nutritious, and conveniently canned beer for dogs.

The market research was simple. Spent some time out in the community talking with the locals at the parks, pounds, and popular pee spots. Well turns out, the dogs all agreed, as long as my craft brew is broth-nutritious and meaty they would drink it for breakfast, lunch, and supper. They would lap it up after a long hike, pack it for a picnic, and slurp it at the beach. (I must say my feline friends were a little peeved – they can be like that sometimes. But I understood. Deep down they just want to have a yummy drink and some fun too – and I am on that! Coming soon, my friends!)

So, I took my research to a local farm.

We needed healthy ingredients for our crafty brew and the good luck is – we found them! Turns out, our local farmer has all these yummy fruits and vegetables that the humans don’t want. I guess they are shaped a little funny, and some have spots. Haha, that sounds like most of my dog buddies!
“This is is great for the environment!” The humans were excited and I was wagging my tail too!

And so I, Einstein the dog, am here to tell you today that my master plan has worked!

I can jump! I can prance! I can wiggle! And I slurp craft beer! Meet the proud Chief Product Developer at
the Crafty Beasts Brewing Company – and I am on a mission of nutrition.

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